Cultural lag and Zambian women

There is a term that I recently came across unbeknown to me before a month ago. The word is "cultural lag" and it got me thinking about a lot of things specifically in the Zambian sense. Cultural lag refers to a situation where culture takes time to catch up with the latest advancements in technology and innovations and this has been a source of a social problems across different cultures. We often hear older generations complain about how "the youths of today have lost their culture" so my question is have we really lost our culture or we have evolved and the older generations are failing to embrace this evolution? 

I believe culture comes as a consequence of norms established over time and while cultural preservation is important for identity, some elements of our culture aren't so progressive and can be subjected to secular intellectual debate and thus improved on. When I read Chinua Achebe's Things for apart, I was bemused to learn that it was once their tradition and culture to dispose off babies born as twins in the evil forest. Consequently this is no longer accepted practice as it has been deemed as inhumane. 

Not so long ago, there was a wave on Zambian social media about 'rape' why it's under-reported and how almost every female has experienced some form of sexual assault, either physically or verbally. Could this be because our culture actually allows it or normalises it by first and foremost stigmatising the victim and thus discourages them from filing reports? Our own first lady was recorded as saying women get raped because of how they dress. Like honestly, it is appalling. Furthermore, I've heard about women being stripped naked in the streets because they did not dress "appropriately" and culturally acceptable. When we see young women embrace western style dress codes, they are called off for not knowing what there culture is, for being spoilt and in the extreme, they are called whores. Like how do we judge someone from their fashion choices? 

Back to the rape issue, It could be a lot of other things involved but I feel like Zambian culture has been retrogressive when it comes to addressing matters that relate to rape. Marital rape for example is viewed as a normal part of a marriage. I've heard about how 'bana chimbusa' teach young women that a man is entitled to sex from his wife whenever he feels like. There is a total disregard for women's needs and feelings, our culture objectifies women and a wife is simply a sex doll for the husband. With the age of feminism truly upon us (I'd like to believe that I'm a male feminist or at least I support the cause) a lot of things have been subjected to moral debates on social media. As the new 'woke' movement is being ushered in, I think we can do more to look at the root cause of many of the gender related problems that females face. It is concerning that males are viewed as superior beings, they are taught to be the head of the house (no collaborative efforts), they are given a license to discipline (physically) their wives and these are all cultural problems I believe. 

I was recently involved in an intellectual intercourse with a colleague on how society seems to always project successful women as people who attained their success by sleeping around with made men. This I have discovered is the normal thought process for a lot of Zambians. We do not believe that women can achieve solo success. Our culture and tradition is misogynistic. From a young age parents will encourage their male children to reach greater heights while at the same time teach the girl child culinary arts to equip her with skills for her future husband. For a long time our girls grew up with one ambition and that was to get married to a rich and successful man. It is still a shock today to find young successful women, by success I don't mean a job after a college education (because in truth, we are improving on that albeit at a slower rate than we should be). The gender roles in the Zambian society need a serious review. "Mwana mukazi safunika kucita ivi" or "mwana mukazi afunika aziba kucita vaso" are common things that we hear or have heard at some point our parents say to our sisters. Who wrote the the rule book that says girls should wash dishes or clean the house while the boys sleep or watch TV or do whatever it is that interests them? 

All in all, I believe our culture hasn't evolved nor has it been given the space to evolve. We still lag behind when it comes to our thought process involving women. We still think women belong in the kitchen. We still condition girls to think marriage is their biggest achievement. We still look down on women who choose to do things different, to dress different, we look down on those that choose to express their sexuality. And that to me that is bad culture and if it means losing our culture for us to be more progressive, I fully support the cause and the movement. 

Carpe diem